Here's a little confession. That late night at work months ago certainly pushed me into going to Africa, but one of the other inspirations was the HBO/BBC production of "The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency" starring Jill Scott. From the show, my list of priorities were - visit Botswana, feel the heat of the Kalahari, sip red bush tea and learn how to speak in clicks.
I kept on reading the novels while our trusty truck, Kavango, charged towards the Botswana border. I also imagined that Jill Scott would be at the other side with a cup of red bush tea and a mystery to be solved.
Reality was somewhat different. Border crossing in reality involved no friendly gestures of red bush tea, but a hastily concocted plan to get rid of weed Marc and hide the steaks from customs. And elephants. Lots and lots of elephants.
The Weed
Pineapple Express is probably the best movie I can use to describe Marc. He claimed to get offered weed everywhere. Even on his honeymoon. By the time we were about to leave Kruger, his supply had dwindled down to one last joint and we were supposed to get rid of it via any means before we got to the Botswana border.
At the last rest stop before the border, a sudden revelation dawned. We still have that one last joint. Lindi was already eager to get the us moving. But one last joint! What to do!?
Then, a local man walked past Kavango. He asked for a cigarette. Ross, the only smoker on the truck was otherwise occupied at the drop toilet. What to do?!
"The joint! Let's give him that joint!"
And thus we avoided an unappetising stint in a Botswana jail.
The Steaks
Botswana is known for its beef exports and is quite protective of its industry. Smuggling meat products across the border is illegal. However, Botswana also has a much stronger currency (the Pula) in comparison to the South African Rand. So when budgeting for an overland trip, it is good economics to smuggle some steaks.
The trick is to take the steaks out of the fridge at the border (where the customs fellow checks), and hide it in the lockers (where they don't check).
The Elephants in the Room
Botswana is like Texas. Everything is bigger. Even the elephants. When South Africa was going through Apartheid, Botswana was quite rightly worried. The government spent a lot of money to boost the military. The end of Apartheid allowed the army's focus to shift towards poachers, and thus Botswana came to have one of the best anti-poaching programs in the world. Every ten minutes or so in Botswana, you bump into a herd by the side of the road - all still with their tusks intact.
I kept on reading the novels while our trusty truck, Kavango, charged towards the Botswana border. I also imagined that Jill Scott would be at the other side with a cup of red bush tea and a mystery to be solved.
Reality was somewhat different. Border crossing in reality involved no friendly gestures of red bush tea, but a hastily concocted plan to get rid of weed Marc and hide the steaks from customs. And elephants. Lots and lots of elephants.
The Weed
Pineapple Express is probably the best movie I can use to describe Marc. He claimed to get offered weed everywhere. Even on his honeymoon. By the time we were about to leave Kruger, his supply had dwindled down to one last joint and we were supposed to get rid of it via any means before we got to the Botswana border.
At the last rest stop before the border, a sudden revelation dawned. We still have that one last joint. Lindi was already eager to get the us moving. But one last joint! What to do!?
Then, a local man walked past Kavango. He asked for a cigarette. Ross, the only smoker on the truck was otherwise occupied at the drop toilet. What to do?!
"The joint! Let's give him that joint!"
And thus we avoided an unappetising stint in a Botswana jail.
The Steaks
Botswana is known for its beef exports and is quite protective of its industry. Smuggling meat products across the border is illegal. However, Botswana also has a much stronger currency (the Pula) in comparison to the South African Rand. So when budgeting for an overland trip, it is good economics to smuggle some steaks.
The trick is to take the steaks out of the fridge at the border (where the customs fellow checks), and hide it in the lockers (where they don't check).
The Elephants in the Room
Botswana is like Texas. Everything is bigger. Even the elephants. When South Africa was going through Apartheid, Botswana was quite rightly worried. The government spent a lot of money to boost the military. The end of Apartheid allowed the army's focus to shift towards poachers, and thus Botswana came to have one of the best anti-poaching programs in the world. Every ten minutes or so in Botswana, you bump into a herd by the side of the road - all still with their tusks intact.
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